Monday, August 25, 2008

Glochenspiel

Thats why english sucks.

Anyone ever heard this spelling "rule": 'I' Before 'E' except after 'C'. Oh right, or if there is a word that sounds like an 'A', ya know like neighbor or weigh. Oh wait, but that not true either, because of WEIRD words like WEIRD or Society, or either/neither, science, species, sovereignty, vein, feisty, seize, neighbor, kaleidoscope, sufficient, their, policies, fancied, ancient, glacier, caffeine, being, feisty, height, seismic, heist, seeing, foreign, etc. etc. etc. (I put that there three times for enphaces on how many more words go there). Essentialy, you can't call that a spelling rule anymore. If there are three exceptions, and hundreds of words that brake the rule, then how can you consider it a rule. On top of that...

English is the language with the most homo/synonyms. That means that english computer spell checkers hate us, and have a horrible time trying to truly correct our spellings. That also means that when someone trys to say something, they may (or may not), be trying to say soemthing diffrent. Who really knows. It also gives our English teachers license to make us choose more latin based words (incredible, gnarl, galloped, aroma) to "spice up" our essays and homework, rather then the germanic based words we all love so much (bad, bite, run, catch, smell). Essentialy, your better sticking to a real cut and dry language like german or spanish. Or you could stick to a really nice/romantic sounding one, like French or Italian. Pretty much if you speak English people know your an ignorant pig. The only thing you could do worse, is speak Japanese.

An Ode to the Spelling Chequer
Prays the Lord for the spelling chequerThat came with our pea sea!Mecca mistake and it puts you riteIts so easy to ewes, you sea.
I never used to no, was it e before eye?(Four sometimes its eye before e.)But now I've discovered the quay to successIt's as simple as won, too, free!
Sew watt if you lose a letter or two,The whirled won't come two an end!Can't you sea? It's as plane as the knows on yore faceS. Chequer's my very best friend
I've always had trubble with letters that double"Is it one or to S's?" I'd wineBut now, as I've tolled you this chequer is grateAnd its hi thyme you got won, like mine.

9 comments:

Cap'n_Jack said...

Yeah, English sucks ass. I owuld learn Spanish some more but Benabe's scarred me and now I don't really want to anymore. So go finnish! So naida te englannin kieli puhuva kalu juurivesa!

shadowoftruth said...

well yea this is whys i'm so bad at it it fialed thats why i'm trying to learn latin... or hygrogliphs any way james smells like a gay rapist is now the #1 topic!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! yay!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! and there was much rejoicing

Bishopk said...

You mention the word "Society" In your list of words that have ei in them. Failage.

Vampi. said...

Bish, he meant the 'I before E except after C' rule.

You mean... I'm not the ONLY one who wants to learn Finnish?!
Latin would be nice too...

Cap'n_Jack said...

Yes, apparently there's one other person anywhere besides you who's learnign finnish. The grammar's fucking horrendous, but it sounds pretty.

chickenboy said...

No, society is an eception to the exception. YOU fail. Sir.

Vampi. said...

I can sing a song in Finnish... Its pretty ^_^
I'd love to live in Finland. Lots of snow, polar bears, and beautiful sunrises/sunsets. The architecture in Helsinki is stunning aswell...

livetrapper13 said...

ich willst sprecken deutche!!

ja, it's a longh waye inn the makeing butt waye beatter thane mye eniglish.

livetrapper13 said...

AND,, imh deutche it aint matter if u havea da lisp. ( and who was stupid enough to put a sp sound in lisp!!! YOU SIR ARE A JERK!!! go jump off a very big cliff with lots of those sharp pointy rocks at the bottom, and maybe even next to an ocean so if the sharp pointy rocks don't kill you then the sharks/drowning/shafo on a surf board will)

das ist all