Saturday, August 9, 2008

Party Time

So, info on my potential party

Remember the epic infamous pary I had some time earlier? It's about to be duplicated bitch. Maybe. I have to ask my dad and he's out to lunch, and I have to write my fucking summer reading thingy first, but I'll do that today. Since my dad's pretty leniant, he'll probably say sure, so what day'll be good for you guys? Any day is fine. Oh, and bring anything you want, like an Xbox and games or something like that. There will be piza again, and like last time, I will stick each and every piece down my pants. But the whole party thing'stentative, so don't get your hopes up yet. Read the full article.

Thursday, August 7, 2008

Barack Obama's Invesco Showdown Of Presidential Destiny

In an effort to kick off the DNC right, Obama's doing his acceptance speech at Invesco Field on August 28, 2008.
Obama's campaign is allowing Colorado residents to come watch him at Invesco, which makes it a perfect opportunity to examine his rhetoric and engage ourselves in the political process.
Or, if we bring Matt along, make fun of his ridiculous ideas.

In any case, I've applied for a Community Credential at and encourage you all to do the same!

EDIT: Oh yeah, August 28th is a Thursday, so we might have to skip school.
Read the full article.

Tuesday, August 5, 2008

Jeopardy in Hawaii

Registration / Party time.
Well, today was surprisingly better then it should have been. As some of you may know(everyone), we went to check-in today as planned at 11:15. Somehow, the school's administration got the event planned well enough that we managed to get out of the building before 12:30. That is a shocker, because in freshman year, it took me 3 hours and 45 minutes to get out of the building, and the school started closing boothes before everyone could get through the line. Suckish time. Well we learned a few things while we waited in line.

1) Our school suports steroid usage and smoking (as witnessed on the front cover of our REQUIRED planners with a smoking musclular mascott)
2) The school hates me. It does any/everything it can to seperate me from my friends
3) Marc is part giraffe
4) James is so white that we could send his school picture in for a front cover picture on a Daniel Shan novel

Afterwords we went over to Tony's house and played Brawl (shocker), Halo and Rock band (we learned James and I can't sing. Period. Excalamation point). Several of us blatently lied to our parental units. Oh, and James, Jack, and I rode illegaly over to Tony's house in Jacks piece of crap car. Good times.

Last bit, Jack ask your parents for that party. If you can't then I can ask mine, but only if you people bring gaming sytems. I don't have any. Soooo yea.
Read the full article.

Sunday, August 3, 2008

An Idea

It'll be part of my standup routine one day.

I had a great idea the other day: automatic sliding doors on bathroom stalls. Imagine, if you will:
You're in a department store, carrying loads of bags for your wife. Suddenly, nature starts calling. Option A: Hold it. Option B: Leave your poor wife there with her purchases while you run away screaming. That's why I always carry an Option C. Here, Option C is to quietly tell your wife you're going to go look at some shoes, and then head to the sliding-door bathroom. This brings up another question. While your hands are full with packages, how can you unzip your pants? It took me two seconds to figure this one out: sliding doors on pants.
As far as bathroom stalls go, that would lead to seriously awesome pranks. Imagine, if you will:
A modern American using the public restroom. The American enters through the automatic doors - by the way, they wouldn't need to be glass doors. That would just be gross - and uses the facilities. Now, said American wants to return to their life outside the confines of the restroom. Alas, the door is locked! Luckily, there is a "call for assistance" button on the inside of the door. Upon pressing, it announces throughout the store, "Customer needs assistance in: taking a dump."
Read the full article.