Wednesday, December 17, 2008

Pirate Version of "My Favourite Things"

You know that one song in "Sound of Music"? This is the pirate version. Enjoy.

Raindrops on hookers and rum in large bottles
Full-loaded pistols and some more rum all around
Some fine naked wenches tied up with strings
These are a few of my favorite things

A large unarmed merchant ship brimming with gold
An old map that leads to treasures untold
A fine feathery parrot that also sings
These are a few of my favorite things

Girls without dresses who like to drink whiskey
It also helps if they’re a tad frisky
A pirate armada that frightens kings
These are a few of my favorite things

When the navy attacks
When I’ve got syphilis
When I am amrooned
I simply remember my favorite things
And then I don't feel so bad

(repeat as necessary)
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Tuesday, December 16, 2008

Silly, silly, silly

Another conversation from AIM. I think James and I spend too much time together...yes, we were talking about bishop at the beginning!

DrtyLb8 (9:46:31 PM): hmm. But I haven't heard of him having a normalish one.
funnyguy3993 (9:47:01 PM): It was like...damn, I can't remember
funnyguy3993 (9:47:06 PM): I'll ask him later
DrtyLb8 (9:47:10 PM): silly*
funnyguy3993 (9:47:19 PM): Silly...
funnyguy3993 (9:47:22 PM): Darn
DrtyLb8 (9:47:29 PM): Silly is totally an exclamation
DrtyLb8 (9:47:36 PM): Silly! God silly it!
funnyguy3993 (9:47:46 PM): Go silly yourself!
DrtyLb8 (9:47:50 PM): ouch
DrtyLb8 (9:47:51 PM): that's harsh
DrtyLb8 (9:47:58 PM): I'll go put on my clown boots and wig
funnyguy3993 (9:48:06 PM): That's amazing
DrtyLb8 (9:48:10 PM): that will now be a terrible euphemism for fucking
funnyguy3993 (9:48:11 PM): I'm gunna have to start using it
funnyguy3993 (9:49:06 PM): You are a total silly, now stop it and go silly yourseelf before I stick this silly gun up your silly!
DrtyLb8 (9:49:29 PM): i put on my robe and wizard hat
DrtyLb8 (9:50:08 PM): oh, do you not get that allusion...nevermind
funnyguy3993 (9:50:19 PM): I should go back to one of Jacks previous posts and edit evry cuss word with silly.
funnyguy3993 (9:52:00 PM): Silly Silly Some Godsilly silly Silly. There once was a jolly lad called Spunky. Now, you may be asking your darling little selves, "Why would Spunky's mommy and daddy call him 'Spunky' after the stork brought him?" Well, first off, babies are made when a mommy and a daddy love each other very much, or when a daddy pays a mommy some money and forgets a silly, or when a daddy has uncontrollable urges and steals a mommy, or if two mommies love each other and get some silly.
DrtyLb8 (9:52:40 PM): condom and sperm are not cuss words
funnyguy3993 (9:52:51 PM): They can if I decide them to be
DrtyLb8 (9:54:29 PM): okay...I'm going to bed...see you tomorrow.
DrtyLb8 (9:54:34 PM): MORE FINALS WOO
DrtyLb8 (9:54:59 PM): greek, non homo love for you.
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Top Ten: Humans

A list of the top ten human beings.

10. Kyle Bishop
An amazing comedian and future president.
9. Will Smith
Actor by day, BAMF by night. Actually, he's always a BAMF.
8. Freddie Mercury
7. Jimmy Wales
Wikipedia creator. Well, Richard Stallman and Larry Sanger helped.
6. Randall Munroe
xkcd creator. There's nothing really to explain here.
5. Galileo Galilei
Ooh, now we're getting to the good ones. Astronomer and all-around BAMF.
4. Garth Brooks
Best singer in the history of ever. Sorry, Freddie.
3. Queen Victoria
(Formerly) the most influential woman in the world. Now dead.
2. Stephen T. Colbert
Comedian, actor, lover. My inspiration. Not much to say here.
1. Brian Williams
Have you ever heard his voice? He's an angel in newscaster form.
Complain away.
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